4.6.e Video: Managing a Difficult Conversation using DEAR

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Recall that you have learned how to approach a difficult conversation using ABCD/DEAR. In this video Roy Johnson will demonstrate how to proceed from bridge the conversation and explain the impact, to address the conflict and make a request for the future. Addressing conflict requires leadership and a commitment to transforming conflict. Click on "video transcript" to download a transcript of this video.

 

Video summary:

Video summary: 

  • Within a week of the initial conflict (where you used strategies to get through the task at hand), approach the other person for a process discussion.
  • 2 critical skills to get you through this difficult conversation are: acknowledging and staying curious.

Use DEAR:

  1. Describe specifically what you saw and heard. Do not generalize, and do not exaggerate.
  2. Explain the impacts of that. Talk about your feelings if you have a good working relationship, but if they’re a bully, talk about how the problem is getting in their way.
  3. Ask to hear their point of view. They might say something a little different from your perspective.
  4. Request a change for the future. Make it practical.

Download Video transcript